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Let's Hang Out.....

Before I say anything about what's been going on with me lately, I wanna say this real quick, because time is growing short:

We are going to be in the Lost Diner chatroom in a short few hours... live tonight.... for the return of the weekly Diner chat. It's been awhile, with all that's been going on we haven't had one for some time. But... I feel today is the day. So, please join us if you'd like. That's 9 .pm. Eastern Time, check here to see when that is in your corner of the world. The regular night has been changed from Thursdays to Tuesdays so this will be our first chat on the new night! Hope to see some of you there.....

OK, that said.... on to the more personal stuff. It has been hard to make myself come back here, I actually always fear what I might find. Mark has posted something nasty things here in the past. And then, some of you guys still have him on your friends list so I assume you are cool with what he did to me and consider him a 'friend'. And those who don't have HIM on their friends list, still have people on their lists who were cruel and blindsided enough to attack me on his behalf after all that has happened, people that call him their friend. So, I don't even feel comfortable commenting on the journals where these people are all over the place. Unfortunately, LJ is just a bad, sad place for me now in light of what has happened and what is happening. I get stressed out coming here. And I would delete my account right now except for the fact that I do LOVE some of you guys, some of you are my good friends, and this is the only way I have of staying in touch with some of you. So I don't really know what the Hell to do...

I am posting over on my 360 blog pretty regularly now. I feel more comfortable there. So many people I know on 360 have expressed absolute outrage at what Mark did, and have even helped me to get legal advice/representation and to figure out how to proceed with having justice served over the numerous criminal acts he perpetrated against me and my family. None of them are friends of his, or even friends of friends of his. There are no connections to him there. This just makes me feel more safe and more comfortable at this time. When I have been having some pretty dark thoughts about not even wanting to be alive anymore, I just really need to be in an environment where I can feel safe and try to heal. This is nothing against anybody here. I really wish this was all different. And maybe it will be in time.

You are all free to come over and check out whatever I am posting there anytime, though I know that most people on LJ end up sticking to LJ. Either way, just so you know you can always find out what's going on with me there, or you can also contact me directly at shady@lostdestinations.com ...or visit me at any of my websites.

I do wanna stay in touch with you guys.

Yesterday I went out with Lobo and climbed to the top of the Franklin Mountains... I watched my city moving below... felt the connection of life and time and how it all goes on... and of course I had my camera with me and took a ton of photos. It felt cathartic. My camera has lately been my shield against pain, my escape hatch. My photography has come to mean something much, much more to me than just visuals or images. I have been going nuts on my flickr account, posting photos and trying to get feedback and make connections. I want to be a good photographer, I want to be a better photographer, I want to be better than a 'good' photographer. If any of you guys are on flickr, please add me, comment on my pages, show me yours. I would love to make more contacts there.

So... visit me at my 360 blog.... come hang out in the (now-Tuesday-night) weekly Diner chats.... hit me up my flickr account. I really hope to remain in touch with you all. I love you guys and I hope everyone is doing well.... take care all....

...and now, a totally random icon:

Ooh looky it's the totally random, ever-changing icon o' fun!!

Comments

sidepocket_pro
Jan. 19th, 2007 05:22 pm (UTC)
I feel sad that I found this LJ at the end of your bad situation. I just found your awsome website about abandon and haunted places since I was looking up odd places in my homestate of New Jersey. I hope that were ever you are now that people are not bothering you.

Oh, and I joined your forum. :)

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lostshady
Shady, Shady, tattooed lady
Lost Destinations

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